Oh Italy, your willingness to do whatever the F you want and then call it a film has never ceased to amaze me. Case in point the subject of today’s revoltin’ review: Wild Beasts – a film whose elevator pitch would simply read: “After the water supply of a nondescript European city gets contaminated with PCP the animals at the local zoo get high AF, escape, and flat-out murder anyone and everyone in sight”. But believe you me my creeps, there’s so much more. In the thick of things are the dynamic duo; animal expert Laura Schwarz and her bosom companion Rupert Berner (a man that looks like the unholy union of Tom Selleck and Imperious Leader from Battlestar Galactica) who must find a way to chill these mother F’n animals the mother F’n out. Along the way we are treated to outrageously questionable nudity, rats eating boobs (that hoary ol’ chestnut), elephant related car trouble (not covered by insurance), a blind man devoured by a German Shepard (Dickie, is that you?), a cheetah chasing down an automobile (prefaced by the shittiest rip-off of Rapper’s Delight you will ever hear), a polar bear in a school (results not as disastrous as expected), and so very, very much more…

    Let’s make one thing perfectly clear; there is more actual animal death on film here than there should be for my taste (I hover somewhere between zero and negative one for the amount of real animal death I enjoy seeing), so forewarned is forearmed. That being said; this flick is a big fat pant’s load of a good time; the dubbing is absolutely atrocious (though the original Italian audio is included as well), the gore if plentiful, the situations are absurd…everything that makes for an entertaining vacay in the exploitation zone™…if you can get past that one sticky wicket listed previous, and the amount of animals featured going bonkers is staggering. I’m not even sure how they pulled half this crap off without the entire cast and crew being violently mauled to death (although the special features help to illuminate some of that).

    So the flick itself is a real one way ticket to WTFville, but what of the quality of the Blu-ray you may (but probably won’t) ask? It is stunning. Having only seen this film previously as a beat to hell VHS rental, I can truly say the remastering job done by those sexy devils at Severin is nothing short of flat out gorgeous, as the screen surges with lurid color…mostly crimson…flowing, dripping crimson…

    As for the beastly bonuses included with this wacky son of a bitch, you get; informative interviews with Director Franco E, Prosperi, Actor Tony Di Leo, Editor Mario Morra, and the son of the film’s animal wrangler Roberto Tiberti. Rounding out the package are a visit to Prosperi’s home, and a trailer.

    All in all, this is admittedly a must see piece of off kilter exploitation that shouldn’t be missed (as long as you can get past those non-simulated damn deaths)…just make sure you have reinforced flooring from the amount of times your jaw will be slamming into the floor!

    Daniel XIII
    Daniel XIII; the result of an arcane ritual involving a King Diamond album, a box of Count Chocula, and a copy of Swank magazine, is a screenwriter, actor, artist, and reviewer of fright flicks…Who hates ya baby?

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